05 Sep A Labor (Day) of Love
As a doula, when I hear the word “labor” my mind naturally goes to thinking about birth, babies, hard work, perseverance, and basically every other word that is badassery or motherhood.
But surprisingly enough, that is not the Labor of Love I want to talk about today (though it is the very foundation of motherhood/parenthood).
What I want to talk about is the Labor of Love each of us go (have gone, are going) through.
What I mean is simply we must (labor) to love ourselves.
When we love ourselves, when we have a genuine like of ourselves, we are not held back by ourselves.
Because if we are real, we are always the ones holding ourselves back the most.
We are the one in the corner (whether literally or internally), wondering if we really fit in, and sometimes paralyzed by the fear of saying or doing something ridiculous, and in turn not being loved.
And let’s be real, it all came from somewhere. From our families, from messed up “friendships”, from poor choices we’ve made, from lies we’ve been told, the reality is this whole damn world is set up to tell us we are unloved.
Now, I’d be lying if I said I have never struggled, or made decisions from this place. #humanalert
But this is what I’ve found, we are all human and we are all in this together. I know it sounds cliché but the truth is:
WE ALL BELONG.
Grabbing ahold of that, must cause change in us.
We come to realize that if we don’t feel we belong, how can we ever welcome others?
Isn’t that the truth?
See that’s the other thing, we have to tell the truth.
The truth of who we are.
I’ve learned that well from these courageous women:
Funny enough, I got to put this whole (labor) of love into practice this morning as I did a yoga class for the first time ever.
I started looking around when I first got there…
(and OH can’t looking around get us in trouble sometimes)
Internally: “Wow these people are fit. I hope I’m able to do this…I’m not sure I belong here, I’m not sure I beeeellllooo….”
And then I stopped it. I CHOSE to make it stop.
I told myself:
I love you.
And then I did yoga for the first time ever. And at points throughout I wanted to cry because I was so connected to my body, my breath, my spirit.
I guess it had been awhile.
I was looking around not at others to gage how enough (or not enough) I was, but rather to make sure I was doing the right moves.
They became my helpers.
About half way through, I had a thought, “Yoga is the practice of kindness towards my body.”
And there it is, when we are kind to ourselves and love ourselves, we can give all of that out too.
We can stop being afraid, we can come out of hiding, we belong. There is a place for us.
Will you join me in this (labor) of love?
Written By: Melinda Britton, Owner, Doulas of Marquette